The Vampire & Her Witch Chapter 2034: A Flame In The Dark (Part Three)

"... the days when you could choose their paths have ended, Lady Maela, and the surest way to lose them is to fail to recognize that truth..."

Ignatious’s voice was soft and gentle, and his words came from a place of kindness, but they cut Maela’s heart like a knife.

In the darkness, there was only a single, tiny flame between them, but it was enough to see how serious the other man was. Worse, he was an Inquisitor, a High Inquisitor at that. A man capable of carrying a Holy Flame Blade would have burned falsehood out of his being long ago. So when he said that both her daughters were on a path that could only end with Jocelynn’s death and that they were risking everything to turn away from it...

"Is this really the only way to save my Jocelynn?" Maela asked. She felt very small in the darkness and she clung to the light of the single flame Ignatious held like a drowning woman clinging to a branch.

"That’s not the question you should be asking," Ignatious said. "It’s the path they’ve both chosen. Whether another method exists or not, the time for considering it ended long ago."

"I, I know," Maela said, slumping in defeat. "When Jocelynn left, the knight, Sir Ollie, told me that the ritual would begin tomorrow once the sun had set. He asked me to be there to support her, no matter what I felt," she said.

"You came here looking for the strength to help your daughters," Ignatious said. "Were you looking for the strength to accept their decision? Or the strength to change their minds?"

"Both. Either," Maela said honestly. "I’m afraid of losing them. I’m afraid that there’s nothing I can do... I failed them both twice already," she said. "And now, it feels like... Like I’m going to lose them both, no matter what happens," she added in a very small voice.

As much as she had come to accept the truth of Ignatious’s words, there was too much that she still didn’t understand.

"Why?" Ignatious asked. "When you began the Supplication of Flame, you named fear as the feeling you wanted to burn away. What is the fear that’s driving you?"

"I’m afraid of losing the people I love again," Maela said directly. "Not just Jocelynn, but Ashlynn and Rhys... This past year, I’ve struggled with losing Ashlynn, and when Rhys went along with Bors Lothian’s scheme and hid her death so that Jocelynn could take Ashlynn’s place... I hated him so much that I couldn’t go home..."

"But I hated him more because he could still love Jocelynn after what she did," Maela admitted. "And I... I didn’t think I could. But when I heard that Jocelynn almost died at the hands of the Inquisition..."

"You found that the love in your heart hadn’t died," Ignatious said. He set a hand on Maela’s shoulder and gave her a gentle squeeze. "That’s a good thing. But it makes everything else harder. Doesn’t it?"

"It does," Maela said.

"There’s nothing wrong with being afraid that Jocelynn will die in her trial," Ignatious said. "Ollie nearly died in his. Heila nearly died in hers. They became witches by overcoming one of the most dangerous things a person can ever attempt, and Jocelynn’s trial will be even harder than theirs. It’s normal to be afraid when someone you love faces that kind of danger," he said.

"But why are you afraid that you’ll lose them even if Jocelynn succeeds?" Ignatious asked.

"Because they’re changing," Maela said. "I don’t mean changing the way a girl changes when she becomes a woman. I accepted that Ashlynn was about to start a life of her own, with a husband of her own and, hopefully, children of her own..."

"My little miracle was going to leave me and make miracles of her own," Maela said with a fragile smile as she remembered the dreams she’d once had of holding her grandchildren in her arms. "And Jocelynn would have followed after once she found a man who could love her and make her happy the way Rhys made me happy."

"I could still have helped them through those challenges," Maela said quietly. "I could have told them how I took Ashlynn down to the docks when she wouldn’t sleep... I wrapped her up tight and I climbed into this little dinghy and held her while the waves rocked us, and some nights, it was the only way she’d sleep. When it was Jocey’s turn, Rhys had a special little boat built for us so we could sleep on the water..."

"There were so many things I thought I could still help and guide them with," Maela said. "Things my mother helped me with and things I had to figure out for myself... But I don’t know how to help them with the things they’re facing now. Rituals and witchcraft. Ruling an empire. Vampire lovers and a Church that will do anything to kill them both for being what they are..."

"How am I supposed to be a mother to an empress and a witch?" Maela asked. "How am I supposed to be a mother to daughters who have tried to kill each other, even if both of them survived?"

"You’re afraid that you don’t have a place in their new world," Ignatious said. "Your daughter didn’t come to you for advice. She went to a witch, a sorcerer, and an artificer before she came to you. And when she finally came to you, she didn’t ask for your thoughts; she’d already made up her mind."

"I felt so useless," Maela said. "And when I tried to offer help or consider alternatives with her, it just turned into a fight and drove her away..."

"But she still wants you by her side," Ignatious pointed out. "She still wants her mother’s love. Desperately. And you can still give her that, just by going to the ritual tomorrow."

"It doesn’t feel like enough," Maela said. "Standing there on the side while she faces danger like that... It doesn’t feel like I’m doing enough as her mother."

"Then do more," Ignatious said as though it were a simple thing. "You can’t walk their path, but as their mother, you can begin a new journey of your own. You donned Initiate’s robes in the Sisterhood of Confession. You set your feet on a path to power and miracles of your own."

"I walked away from that path to be with my daughters," Maela said firmly. "I won’t return to it."

"I’m not suggesting that you become a confessor," Ignatious said. "I’m suggesting that you learn to wield power of your own and that you face the struggles that come with doing so. Your path won’t be the same as theirs, but it will give you perspective to understand theirs, and the differences will help you see things that they may miss."

"You missed the opportunity you had to become a skilled sorceress when your daughters were young," Ignatious said. "The Holy Lord of Light laid that path before you, whether you knew it or not. It isn’t your fault that you didn’t recognize it, but because you didn’t master those gifts early, you can’t be one of their mentors now."

"But the Holy Lord of Light never closed that door for you," Ignatious added. "If you have faith in Him, and the courage to walk a harder road, you can still accompany your daughters into their new world. You can learn from them while they learn from you."

"And maybe, one day," Ignatious added with a kind smile. "Jocelynn may still find the sort of love that results in children. If she needs one, then you and Rhys can build her a boat for the river where she can rock her little ones to sleep..."

"Your daughters found new paths," Ignatious pointed out as the flame in his hand grew brighter, from a single candle flame to a small ball of Holy Fire that illuminated the entire chapel. "Your husband is charting a new course of his own in Blackwell. Tonight, your feet brought you here, to the place where a new path begins," he said.

"This path begins with crossing a bed of coals," Ignatious warned. "But if you’re willing to walk it, I promise, I’ll be here to catch you if you stumble and fall..."