My Scumbag System Chapter 334: Flora, Fauna, and Financial Ruin

I let out a long breath and stared at the ceiling.

Okay. Game face on. Time to stop being a simp and start being a strategist.

I sat up, ignoring the protest from my still-healing ribs, and pulled up my System interface. The familiar blue window materialized in front of me, and I navigated straight to the important part.

Schema Points: 1,195

Hot damn. That was a lot of zeros. Well, not zeros exactly, but it was still a fortune by my standards.

The question was: what to spend it on? A thousand possibilities flashed through my mind—upgrades, new abilities, maybe even something for Natalia.

"Nel," I called out to the empty room, my voice cutting through the silence. "You awake? Or do cosmic entities need beauty sleep too?"

A familiar presence tickled the back of my mind, like cold fingers tracing my cerebral cortex. When she spoke, her voice carried that trademark mix of boredom and amusement that I’d come to associate with cosmic customer service—the sound of a god who’s seen it all but still finds your particular brand of desperation entertaining.

"I’m sure he did, the perverted sun god." I scrolled through my ability list, frowning at the numbers. "Listen, I need to talk upgrades. How much to turn my pathetic lighter into an actual weapon?"

"Adjusted how?"

I didn’t like the sound of that. "Give me the breakdown."

Nel materialized a new window, displaying my current combat abilities alongside their upgrade paths.

[EMBER] (Silver Tier)

[SEVER] (Gold Tier)

New Ability Slot

I stared at the numbers. Eight hundred points just to upgrade my two main offensive skills. That would leave me with less than four hundred, barely enough for a few pulls and maybe some gifts for my harem.

"That’s highway robbery," I complained. "Four hundred for each? I could buy a car with that kind of money."

She had a point. Damn her.

I ran the math in my head. The Clockwork Arboretum was a C-Rank gate, which meant enemies would be around my current power level. I could probably clear it with my existing loadout, but why settle for probably when I could guarantee it?

[Sever] was my kill-shot. The invisible blade that had saved my ass more times than I could count. Upgrading it to ignore magical defenses would turn it from a sharp knife into an unstoppable guillotine. Against bosses with protective barriers, that kind of penetration was priceless.

[Ember], on the other hand... well, it was useful, but it wasn’t my primary damage dealer. Not yet anyway. The Dragon Witch’s Ring already gave it a 75% boost. Going from Silver to Gold would be nice, but not essential.

"Alright," I decided. "Let’s upgrade [Sever] first. That’s my bread and butter."

"Do it."

[400 SP deducted]

[SEVER] upgraded to [SPATIAL CLEAVE]!

A rush of information flooded my brain. Not painful exactly, but intense. I could feel the new ability settling into my neural pathways, becoming as natural as breathing. The old [Sever] had been like swinging a sword. This new version felt like wielding a scythe made of compressed space itself.

Schema Points: 795

Still a decent chunk of change. I eyed the Gacha tab with the hunger of a gambling addict who’d just gotten paid.

"Hey, Apollo," I called out to the ceiling. "I’ve got 795 points burning a hole in my pocket. Got anything special on the menu today?"

The response came immediately, the sun god’s voice booming through my consciousness with all the subtlety of a stadium announcer.

"WELL, WELL, WELL! IF IT ISN’T MY FAVORITE LITTLE SCUMBAG! IMPECCABLE TIMING AS ALWAYS. I JUST HAPPEN TO HAVE A NEW BANNER GOING LIVE TODAY."

A massive golden window exploded into existence in front of me, so bright I had to squint. Apollo’s avatar appeared in the corner, a chibi version of himself giving me double thumbs up with a shit-eating grin.

[SPECIAL EVENT BANNER: THE FLORA & FAUNA FESTIVAL!]

I stared at the banner. Then at my SP count. Then back at the banner.

"You absolute bastard," I said, but I was grinning. "You knew about the Clockwork Arboretum."

"I KNOW ABOUT EVERYTHING. NOW ARE YOU GOING TO PULL OR NOT? THE AUDIENCE IS GETTING IMPATIENT."

795 SP. That was enough for a five-pull with some change left over. Or I could save some for emergencies, gifts for my harem, direct stat investment...

But where was the fun in that?

"Screw it," I said. "Let’s go big or go home."

"THAT’S THE SPIRIT! LET THE DIVINE SLOTS SPIN!"

The golden wheel materialized, covered in symbols I only half-recognized. I watched it spin, heart pounding despite myself.

This was it. The moment of truth.

Either I was about to become a botanical demigod perfect for the upcoming dungeon, or I was about to pull five consecutive bronze-tier disappointments and regret every life choice that led me here.

Knowing my luck? Probably both somehow.

The wheel began to slow.