My God domain is the endless abyss Chapter 73: Brain Worm

"Why bestow it life and consciousness?"

Cillian had not anticipated the question posed by the Brain worm, now within Damon's domain.

Honestly, he had never truly considered this creature of great importance. Its capture was solely for the potential knowledge derivable from a swarm's will-node, and to analyze the hive mind's structure. This was his primary motivation for detaining it.

As for granting it life and intellect...?

"My Lord, will you be answering its query?"

"I apologize for the intrusion, but this brain worm is indeed a rather fascinating entity," Damon remarked.

At that moment, the brain worm was undergoing examination under Damon's watchful eye, clearly incapable of resistance. Damon's transmission of its message to the Lord of the Abyss stemmed from mere curiosity, tinged with a peculiar, indescribable pity and affection.

Damon himself was an anomaly, a flawed creation from the reverse-ascension experiment conducted within the Sea of Mind. This circumstance granted him a unique empathy for beings ostracized by their own kind.

Previously, it had merely served as a conduit for the hive's collective consciousness, tasked with amplifying and relaying directives. It possessed no independent thought, no individuality, nor the necessity for self-awareness or a soul; its existence was purely mechanical.

This changed the day Cillian activated the Ring of the Seven Deadly Sins, allowing the breath of the Abyss to permeate its very being.

Everything shifted thereafter.

The brain worm acquired a will. It began to contemplate, to experience emotions, to feel apprehension. It became aware of its own existence, even defying its Hive Mother's command to perish.

And with that defiance came the nascent stirrings of emptiness, confusion, and pain.

Damon, through his vast mental reach, perceived every fragment of this internal conflict. Yet, even he struggled to fully comprehend it. Unable to interpret the sensations, he chose to convey the entirety of it to Cillian, entrusting the final decision to him.

"It is somewhat selfish of me to mention this," Damon confessed softly, "but the brain worm's consciousness holds valuable knowledge. It assisted in refining the initial strategy."

"And its sole request in return," he continued, "is for you to provide an answer to a single question. My Lord, I implore you, do not let an opportunity for the Endless Abyss to advance further be squandered due to my subordinate's perceived foolishness."

Cillian sensed Damon's apprehension without even needing to look.

He understood the creature's fear, not merely as a subordinate to a superior, but as a being capable of annihilating its existence. Damon had intertwined personal sentiment with what should have been an objective analytical process, and for those serving under immense powers, such extraneous emotions were often viewed with disdain.

However, to Cillian, this was a minor concern.

He grasped Damon's intentions and, more importantly, did not disapprove of them.

A subtle smile graced his lips. "Very well," he declared. "I shall provide the answer."

A surge of elation coursed through Damon's consciousness. "Thank you, my Lord. Thank you, magnificent Lord of the Abyss. I shall convey your response—"

"There is no need," Cillian interjected. "I shall attend to it personally."

Damon faltered.

"I will visit your domain," Cillian elaborated, "and meet this individual directly. Ah, and Damon, excellent work."

The Sea of Mind resonated with these words.

Cillian's tone remained tranquil. "You are now part of the Abyss; cast aside unnecessary constraints. Be bold. Within the Abyss, thought itself ought to be unfettered."

"...Understood, my Lord."

In the subsequent instant, a shadow swept across Damon's domain. An endless expanse of dark mist enveloped the ocean of brains constituting his dimension. Innumerable neural clusters contracted, creating an open space at its center.

There, Cillian materialized.

Facing him was the brain worm, a thick, pulsating entity adorned with luminous dream-crystals. Its prior injuries had been completely mended by Damon's ministrations, its severed appendages restored.

"Squeak!"

The creature emitted an alarmed shriek. Instinct compelled it to lash out, its limbs tensing, prepared to confront the imminent intruder.

Damon watched in bewildered horror. The brain worm's reaction was tantamount to blasphemy. Any denizen of the Abyss witnessing such defiance would have instantly annihilated it.

Yet, Cillian merely raised a hand.

"Cease."

Dark mist swirled around him, dissolving the crystalline barrier that had confined the brain worm. His voice was calm, almost gentle. "I comprehend. Without the Hive's suppression of your will, instinct prevails. It is a natural response."

The brain worm stiffened. Its body quivered infinitesimally, and then, with a degree of awkwardness, it retracted its limbs. Tentatively, it extended several smaller appendages, mirroring the respectful posture Damon had demonstrated earlier.

Its utterance, though unpolished, resonated clearly as it employed the Abyssal dialect that Damon had imparted.

"Exalted Lord of the Abyss... I seek enlightenment... on the reasons for my bestowal of life and sentience."

Cillian's visage remained unaltered.

The brain worm persisted, its voice tinged with a subtle tremor.

"Why... have you permitted me to endure such torment and bewilderment?"

"And what... is the profound significance of my very existence?"

A palpable stillness descended upon Damon’s dimension. Even the ceaseless whispers within the Sea of Mind ceased, all awareness converging upon the Lord of the Abyss and the vulnerable entity positioned before him.

These were the very inquiries that had plagued the brain worm since the dawn of its consciousness.

It bore no resemblance to the idealized 'beauty of life' posited by philosophers or scholars. For this creature, existence itself was devoid of beauty. Upon awakening, the sole sensations it experienced were an unending, suffocating pain coupled with profound confusion.

Naturally, this agony was not of a physical nature but rather mental, even spiritual.

As Cillian perceived the creature's quivering words, his eyes narrowed. He scrutinized the 'small worm' before him for an extended duration, a flicker of intrigue crossing his features, before finally articulating his response.

"You perceive your present condition as agonizing? That you feel adrift and disoriented?"

He deflected a direct answer, instead posing a counter-query.

"Indeed, esteemed Lord of the Abyss," the brain worm affirmed. "Though my existence is brief and I grapple with numerous emotions, with Damon's guidance, I comprehend this much: my current sensations are those of pain and confusion."

"I am ignorant of the purpose of my existence, or the reason for my birth into this world. My identity as a being remains an enigma."

Its tone was unnervingly serene, remarkably so for a creature in its predicament. Diverging from the chaotic denizens of the Abyss, the Zerg exhibited a peculiar, almost chilling rationality.

"To any fellow Zerg," it elaborated, "I am an anomaly. I possess independent thought. I have severed my connection with the Hive Mind, my progenitor. And more distressingly, even after this separation..."

The brain worm faltered. Its mandibles quivered minutely before it compelled itself to proceed.

"Ultimately, guided by an errant instinct, I defied the directives of the Hive Mind."

"All these actions... inflict suffering upon me."

"Yet, the most profound ache," it uttered softly, "is the absence of any subsequent commands."

"In my former state, obedience was paramount. From genesis to dissolution, every action was dictated by orders. Sustenance was consumed upon command. Structures were erected as directed. Each movement, each thought, was a direct manifestation of the Hive Mind's will."

"But now..."

Its dark, multifaceted eyes pulsed with uncertainty.

"Now, I am unsure of my designated function."

"I do not know when to partake of sustenance. I do not know where to direct my course. Without directives, I perceive... nothing. Only a void. As though my very being lacks any inherent significance."

Silently, Cillian listened, a subtle smile gracing his lips.

"Your inquiry," he stated at length, "is utterly nonsensical, insignificant creature."

A swirling vortex of black and crimson materialized within his eyes. "However, perhaps a straightforward demonstration will facilitate your comprehension."

He extended a hand, and a tendril of dark mist flowed over the brain worm's substantial form. In that instant, the mist conveyed comprehensive knowledge to him.

The creature indeed possessed a Sea of Mind and a nascent soul, yet both were undeveloped, akin to an embryonic state. It was comparable to a fetus possessing a heartbeat but lacking established consciousness; its mind and soul were merely in their nascent phases.

Nevertheless, this was sufficient.

For Cillian now ascertained its capacity for experiencing pain.

"Squeak!!!"

The instant his gaze intensified, another surge of dark mist erupted, searing across the brain worm's body. The creature convulsed violently, its appendages curling and thrashing in extreme agony. Its bulbous form trembled, every nerve fiber alight with torment.

Within the Abyss, pain was the most abundant and least valued commodity.

Cillian had merely gathered a few fragmented wisps of soul-pain drifting in the Abyss's depths, yet this proved adequate to make the creature's very spirit falter and collapse.

"Lord!" Damon's voice cracked. He could discern the reverberations of agony echoing through the Sea of Mind and felt an uncharacteristic pang of distress.

Cillian disregarded him. Leaning forward slightly, a smirk played on his lips as he observed the creature's violent spasms.

"Tell me, brain worm... how does it feel?"

The brain worm's primal instincts shrieked. The pain, a level that would have instantly annihilated a mortal being, was ravaging its mind, yet it still managed to respond.

"It... hurts..." it wheezed. "But... I... do not... comprehend..."

"You fail to grasp the connection to your original question?" Cillian's tone was gentle, almost derisive.

"Yes!" the worm hissed, froth appearing at its mouthparts as its body thrashed with increased intensity.

Cillian sharply snapped his fingers.

Another wave of dark mist descended.

"Squeak!!!"

The torment intensified, each muscle fiber spasming, every organ feeling like it was boiling. Even its very mind shrieked in pure, inarticulate agony.

And amidst that tempest of anguish, Cillian finally broke his silence:

"The answer to your burning question," he stated, his voice remarkably soft, "is quite straightforward."

"There exists no life devoid of pain."

"To be alive is to endure suffering."

A faint smile touched his lips as he uttered these words. "The very act of birth is painful. Death brings its own pain. And everything found in the span between these two extremes... is also pain."

"Yet, the profound beauty of existence," he proceeded, his tone growing more resonant, "resides in our capacity to transmute agony into a driving purpose. To forge suffering into an unyielding will to persevere."

"Those who truly embrace life accept pain as an intrinsic component of being. They deceive themselves, convincing their own minds that their arduous journey holds significance, merely to propel themselves onward."

He conjured a swirling vortex of dark mist before the brain worm, its surface churning like incandescent night.

"Therefore, I loathe those who prattle on about 'the meaning of life.' Life itself possesses no inherent meaning. None that is worth uncovering. Meaning is an invention of idle beings incapable of confronting the stark reality of their own existence."

He motioned towards the swirling mist. "Should you desire to cease your torment, simply reach out and touch it. This mist is my divine flame; it will obliterate you instantly, both body and soul."

"However, if you choose to persist... the pain will subside within the span of an hour."

His gaze intensified, his eyes beginning to gleam with a crimson luminescence.

"Will you choose oblivion? Or will you continue to bear the suffering?"

The brain worm convulsed with violent tremors.

Its appendages slowly extended, inching towards the dark mist... drawing ever closer to the power that promised ultimate release.