Cultivation Chat Group Chapter 533: Its melting~ My body is melting~ (2 in 1)
Chapter 533: It’s melting~ My body is melting~ (2 in 1)
Translator: GodBrandy Editor: Kurisu
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue’s golden hair swayed in the air, and she looked at the flames burning beneath the golden coffin, somewhat stunned. "Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue, you really lit a fire beneath the golden coffin... I was just teasing little friend Shuhang earlier!"
Although her cultivation realm had been restricted, she was still a Sixth Stage True Monarch. Even if her eyes couldn’t see through objects, she needed but a glance to discern that there was no life aura coming from Lady Onion’s bulging lower abdomen!
The jade white lion Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue stiffened. After a short moment, it turned its head around and forced a smile, saying, "Is that so, Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue? Anyway, I was also just joking, wasn’t that obvious?"
Only an idiot would believe it! No matter how one looked at your serious expression while you were lighting the fire, it didn’t seem that you were joking!
Right at this time, a ’ding, ding’ sound was transmitted from Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue’s pocket.
She grabbed her phone and unlocked it, discovering that someone had logged in inside her chat account from another phone.
"Eh? Who is using Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue’s account?" Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue wondered... she usually used Venerable Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue’s account to read the recent news and gossip posted in the Nine Provinces Number One Group.
From the looks of it, Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue’s main body got online?
Did he finally have the free time to go online?
Thereupon, Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue fiddled with the phone in her hands for a while and logged in with a different account. The name of the account was ’Phoenix Saber Jasmine’, and it was a well-hidden account in the Nine Provinces Number One Group that had almost never made its appearance.
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue rarely used this account since she hadn’t added any friends. Therefore, it wasn’t as entertaining as Venerable Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue’s account.
Just as Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue logged in to the ’Phoenix Saber Jasmine’ account and got into the Nine Provinces Number One Group, she discovered that someone had posted a picture in the group.
The one that sent the picture was Venerable Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue.
The picture depicted a dark chamber tomb with a dazzling golden coffin in the center.
The scene was rather familiar, wasn’t it?
A young man with a dumbfounded look on his face was lying inside the coffin, and above him was a cute girl with two lovable green ponytails. The duo was captured during a rather ambiguous scene.
Actually, the real focus of the picture was the lower abdomen of the cute girl with two ponytails...
No matter how one looked at it, that faintly bulging lower abdomen was rather eye-catching!
"What’s happening? Who sent the picture in the group?" Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue called out.
She surely didn’t send it since she was forced out of the account and had to log in with a different one!
"I didn’t do anything. I don’t even have a phone with me." The jade white lion Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue waved its paws in the air as a sign of its innocence.
"Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue wouldn’t do something so stupid, either. He is a very serious person," Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue added.
Such being the case, who was the culprit?
It shouldn’t be Fifth Cultivator of True Virtue, either... After he successfully transcended the tribulation and lost the Nine Virtues Phoenix Saber, the connection between him and the Fourth, Sixth Cultivator, and Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue had become very feeble.
Therefore, whose doing was it...?
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For Song Shuhang, who was still inside the golden coffin, it didn’t really matter who sent the picture!
As soon as Venerable Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue’s account sent the picture in the Nine Provinces Number One Group, a lot of seniors that were lurking around immediately showed their faces.
Northern River’s Loose Cultivator: "Holy 💩!"
Treasure Forging Heavenly Mansion’s Yang Xian: "Wait a moment, isn’t that young man our little friend Shuhang?"
Island Master Tian Tiankong: "You’re not mistaken! That’s indeed Fellow Daoist Seven Dao Names!"
Vice-Island Master Tian Tianwei: "Who is that little girl lying on him?"
None of the seniors of the Nine Provinces Number One Group had seen Lady Onion’s human form.
But there was one of them that was able to guess the identity of the girl correctly after seeing her green ponytails.
This senior was Young Master Phoenix Slayer. While he was madly beating up the stallion spirit back then, he obtained an important piece of information from him. Apparently, there was a female monster called Lady Onion that was currently staying together with Song Shuhang, and she must have been a very pretty monster if the stallion spirit traveled for thousands of miles just to get his hands on her.
Thereupon, Young Master Phoenix Slayer quickly wrote: "Is it possible that she is the onion spirit that little friend Shuhang has been raising?"
"Is she his monster pet? I didn’t expect little friend Shuhang to be that kind of person. He even impregnated his monster pet." Fairy Lychee wrote. "But why did the onion spirit get pregnant so quickly?"
"It should be because it’s an onion spirit. Its growth cycle should be very fast. Anyway, little friend Shuhang performed brilliantly. The child born from the relationship between a human and a monster onion is bound to be rather interesting, don’t you think? Will it be a human with green onion shoots as hair?" The ID ’Hospitalized Copper Trigram’ wrote at this time.
"Or perhaps it will a green onion with hands and feet?" the ID ’Hospitalized Iron Trigram’ added.
At this time, Thrice Reckless Mad Saber said excitedly, "Fellow Daoists, should we start discussing which name we should give to little friend Shuhang’s child after its born?"
The Nine Provinces Number One Group immediately became very lively.
The one that had started all of this, Venerable Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue’s account, had quietly disappeared without leaving any traces.
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The corner of Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue’s eyes twitched. It seemed she was having a lot of fun.
Inside the golden coffin, little friend Shuhang didn’t react, didn’t make a sound, and didn’t punch the coffin, either.
Even while the fellow daoists in the Nine Provinces Number One Group were happily discussing the name of this future children, Song Shuhang didn’t react.
Had he undergone a mental breakdown?
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue cautiously pushed to one side the lid of the golden coffin... The coffin had become somewhat hot now that fire was burning beneath. However, such a temperature wasn’t really a problem for Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue.
After the golden coffin was uncovered a bit, she saw that Song Shuhang was madly pressing on the phone.
"It’s over, it’s over... my life is over..." Song Shuhang muttered to himself. The screen of his phone was black—it was out of power.
At such a critical moment, the phone had switched off because it ran out of battery.
Such being the case, it should be time for the ’battery charging technique’ to enter into action... but no matter how simple it was, it was still a magical technique.
Since it was a magical technique, he needed his mental energy to control the technique while using it.
The Sea of Qi Dantian inside his body wasn’t the only thing on the verge of exploding. His mental energy had also increased until it was a little too much to handle, and the place between his eyebrows was hurting for this reason.
Given the condition he was in, he was unable to charge his phone.
This was the real reason Song Shuhang wasn’t replying even though the seniors in the group were happily talking about his future children.
Right before his phone switched off, he saw the picture ’Venerable Seventh Cultivator of True Virtue’ sent in the Nine Provinces Number One Group, as well as the excited comments sent by the seniors after seeing the picture...
Thereupon, Song Shuhang quickly activated the voice message feature of the instant messaging app, preparing to send a voice message in the chat to explain to the seniors what was going and clear up the misunderstanding.
But just as he activated the voice message feature and prepared to speak, the phone emitted a ’ding’ sound and switched off while playing a pleasant background music.
Song Shuhang roared inwardly.
He could well imagine how wild the imagination of the seniors of the Nine Provinces Number One Group would run during the period he was offline and couldn’t reply!
Perhaps it wouldn’t be long before he was labeled with the following nicknames: Song ’green onion f*cker’ Shuhang, Song ’doesn’t let off even monster pets’ Shuhang, Song ’father of a half-monster’ Shuhang, and so on.
"It’s over, it’s over..." Song Shuhang repeated over and over again.
In the tail section of the golden coffin, Lady Onion was absent-mindedly curling up into a ball. She was using her small hand to feel her abdomen, not daring to believe what was happening. Her world had lost its colors, becoming completely gray. It was unknown what she was thinking at this time.
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Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue thought of covering the golden coffin again, but right at this time, Song Shuhang raised his head and looked her in the eyes.
It was a very aggrieved look!
"I didn’t send the picture," Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue immediately said.
"..." Song Shuhang.
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue immediately shifted the topic of conversation. "Anyway, little friend Shuhang, how about I use the battery charging technique for you? It’s free of charge."
After saying this much, she stretched out her finger and gently poked Song Shuhang’s phone.
"Crack~"
An electric spark flashed, and the phone automatically turned on since Song Shuhang had been holding the power button all along.
Song Shuhang’s attention was successfully diverted towards the phone.
Now that the phone was working, he could explain to the seniors of the group the truth and clear up the misunderstanding!
Song Shuhang looked at Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue and asked, "Right, Senior Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue. Is it just my misconception or... it’s getting rather hot?"
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue bent her head over and looked at the blazing flames burning beneath the golden coffin.
Immediately after, the golden-haired Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue turned around and ruthlessly kicked away Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue...
"Aaaaah!" Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue called out pitifully. The kick sent it flying and mounted it on the nearby wall.
"You don’t need to worry. It was just the masterpiece of that idiotic Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue. I’ll immediately restore the temperature to what it was before," Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue said and secretly stretched out her hand, putting out the ’holy fire’ that Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue had lit beneath the golden coffin.
"Ding, ding, ding~" The startup sound of the phone echoed.
Song Shuhang’s mobile phone had restarted.
Song Shuhang swiftly moved his fingers and opened the Nine Provinces Number One Group. At this time, his actions were so quick that he had reached supersonic speed.
Right at this time... the seniors of the Nine Provinces Number One Group were discussing how they should name Song Shuhang’s grandsons.
F*ck, I have been offline for just a few minutes, and the conversation has already reached this point?
Then, just as Song Shuhang scrolled through the chat logs, he discovered that Fairy Lychee had sent some pictures in the group by using the ’drawing board feature’. The pictures portrayed a long-haired person with a green onion head and a green onion with feet and hands... It was how she imagined Song Shuhang’s son or daughter.
No, I cannot allow the imagination of the seniors to keep running wild any further! I must clear the misunderstanding!
Song Shuhang clicked on the chatting window and looked for the voice message feature.
But right at this time, Medicine Master suddenly sent him a private message. "Ahahaha~ Little friend Shuhang, I didn’t know that there was this kind of relationship between you and that onion spirit! Anyway, let’s forget about that green onion shoot. You can just help me with something the next time we meet as a compensation for the formula of the medicinal bath. Anyway, it’s worthy of being an onion spirit; even its pregnancy cycle is so fast. Congratulations, little friend Shuhang!"
As soon as he finished reading the message, Song Shuhang fell into depression and his head tilted to one side.
At this time, he felt that things would only get worse if he were to make his appearance and try to clear the misunderstanding.
It’s over, my life is over...
"Little friend Shuhang?" Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue stretched out her hand and poked him.
Song Shuhang mumbled, "It’s over, it’s over, it’s over..."
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue felt that leaving Song Shuhang alone for the time being so that he could calm down was the best choice. Thereupon, she cautiously covered the golden coffin once again.
But right at this time, she got a glimpse of the conversation Song Shuhang was having with Medicine Master. They were talking about the formula of a medicinal bath that could allow Song Shuhang to strengthen his constitution.
"Is that one of the last formulas that Medicine Master came up with? It seems a rather economical and practical formula. Unfortunately, it’s only suitable for low-level cultivators..."
Eh? Isn’t that a pretty good topic to divert his attention?
Thereupon, Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue said, "Little friend Shuhang, do you want the raw materials needed for the formula of the medicinal bath?"
Song Shuhang raised his head and nodded, saying, "Yes."
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue made some calculations and said, "I have all the raw materials needed for the formula of the medicinal bath stored in this place. I can sell them to you at the purchase price. According to my calculations, you need seven spirit stones of the Third Stage to buy enough raw materials to bathe in the medicinal liquid once. Are you interested?"
"Sure." Song Shuhang stretched out his hand and took out a spirit stone of the Fourth Stage from his pocket.
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue received the spirit stone of the Fourth Stage and returned Song Shuhang three spirit stones of the Third Stage.
After taking the three spirit stones of the Third Stage, Song Shuhang opened his size-reducing purse and casually threw them inside.
Then, he kept looking at his phone in a daze.
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Three minutes later, Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue returned and moved the lid of the golden coffin to one side.
Afterward, she threw a big basin full of raw materials into the golden coffin... from the looks of it, she wanted to directly use the coffin as a bathtub, allowing Song Shuhang to bathe in there?
After throwing all the raw materials into the coffin, Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue said to Song Shuhang, "Fellow Daoist Tyrannical Saber Song One, you should temporarily leave the superfluous things on your body to me."
Song Shuhang was still in deep thoughts and his body automatically moved, passing his size-reducing purse, mobile phone, and so on to Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue.
After taking the items, Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue shot a glance at Lady Onion who was curled up in one corner of the golden coffin.
At first, she thought of grabbing the monster onion to carry her out of the coffin. But after pondering for a moment, she changed her mind. After all, it was up to her master, Song Shuhang, whether or not he wanted to move her out. There was no need for her to concern herself with this matter. Perhaps the monster onion would also get lucky and strengthen her constitution a bit.
Moreover, she could take advantage of this opportunity to happily bathe together with her master. Who knew, perhaps she would obtain a favorable impression during this bathing session and make a comeback, becoming the favorite woman of her master?
Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue felt that Lady Onion had a pair of beautiful legs. Therefore, she had a very good impression of her.
After throwing all the raw materials into the coffin, Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue swiftly moved her finger and activated a magical technique.
"Whoosh~" A big ball of water suddenly materialized and fell inside the golden coffin, submerging both Song Shuhang and Lady Onion.
"It’s time to take the medicinal bath... it might be somewhat painful at first, but try to endure!" Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue said.
Then, without waiting for Song Shuhang or Lady Onion to reply, she moved the lid of the golden coffin back, sealing it.
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At this time, the nearby Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue was already ready to get into action.
Just as Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue sealed the coffin, it threw a small golden flask toward the golden coffin.
Flames shot out of the small flask, igniting once again the firewood and gasoline that Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue had placed there earlier.
Flames endlessly poured out of the small flask, strengthening the power of the fire.
Burn~ Burn~ Burn, baby! Burn! Blazing flames were burning inside Fourth Cultivator of True Virtue’s eyes.
"Hmm, it should be enough. According to Medicine Master’s formula, Fellow Daoist Tyrannical Saber Song One should be able to thoroughly absorb the strength of the raw materials after soaking in the medicinal water for two hours." Sixth Cultivator of True Virtue nodded satisfied.
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Inside the golden coffin.